My Marriage Date

I plan on marrying my beautiful Beatrice as soon as possible, but need to talk to her first. I will keep you updated until then.

The Disguise

The second wedding meeting took place today, and my feeling of guilt is freed from my soul. I apologized to Claudio, as he did to me. I feel so relieved to not have to fight Claudio, my best friend, for I love him. As I already knew, Claudio does not know that he was set to marry Leonato’s “niece”, who is actually Hero. Claudio swears that he will marry the mysterious bridesmaid, and Hero unmasks, revealing that she did not die. Claudio wept with joy for the feeling that his loved one is still alive. I cried along with Claudio, for I saw a man grow into a stronger man who is my closest friend. I called out for Beatrice who was also unmasked, and asked her if she loved me. She denied it, and asked me the same question of my love of her, but I denied it too. We both told how we heard the people gossip about how we were madly in love with each other. Since I denied my love to her, Claudio pulled out a letter that I recognized. He handed it to Beatrice stating that the letter is a love letter written in my hand. Like Claudio, Hero does the same, except she hands me a love letter written in Beatrice’s handwriting. We both said that even if we were in love, that it was through pity, but ended up kissing, because we actually are in love.

What A Relief

I told Beatrice that I had challenged Claudio for her, and now she accepts our love. The feeling of being in love is a different feeling that I have ever felt, and it is the best feeling, even though it tickles inside. But I do not like the feeling of knowing that I must fight Claudio. I pray for something to change in order for me not to fight him. Beatrice and I were then summoned by Leonato, and told that Hero has been proven innocent by Borachio confessing that he did not sleep with Hero and that it was all a plan of Don John. As I said before, I knew that Don John set this up. Leonato then told that he will forgive Don Pedro and Claudio for he understands where they got their assumptions of Hero. He plans to wed his “niece”, who is actually Hero, to Claudio. I am extremely relieved that I need not to fight Claudio. I thank God for this relief for answering my prayers.

So Its Set

Today, I went to Claudio, encountering Don Pedro with him. I was angry with Claudio, so I insulted him and demanded a duel between him and me. He accepted for he was angry as I was, but I was in anger and a bit nervous. I told Claudio what I thought of him, and how he “killed a sweet lady, and [that] her death shall fall heavy on” him (165).

The Wedding Melee

Today was a mixture of all feelings wrapped into one day. First, the wedding ceremony began, and the friar asked if Claudio would like to marry Hero, but he said “no”. All people gathered were confused and did not understand what was happening, like me. Suddenly, Claudio became in a state of wrath that even scared me a little. He proclaimed that Hero had dishonored everyone around her for he and Don Pedro saw her and Borachio, a loyal servant of Don Pedro’s brother who is Don John, having sex. Soon after Claudio pushed Hero to the ground, Hero cries innocently that she is still is a pure, and that she did not sleep with anyone. Leonato does not believe this, and starts attacking her with harsh words. The melee was intense, and it was painful to watch a family and soon-to-be-married-couple break apart. Hero fell to the ground and fainted. Personally, I do not believe in Hero sleeping with Borachio, but that Don John has plot an evil plan to break the love between Hero and Claudio, for Claudio and the Prince both respect honor and would not just falsely accuse anyone. The friar stated that he believes that Hero is innocent and that Leonato should proclaim publicly that Hero has died even though she has not. I feel awfully sorry for Leonato, because if his daughter is innocent or not, he will lose someone close to him either way. After everybody left, Beatrice and I were left alone. She was crying for her cousin. She stated that her “fair cousin is wronged” and that Hero’s life will change completely into a poor, sad life. I followed with saying that I love her, and she professes that she loves me, but only if I kill Claudio. I was hesitant and still am, but I agreed for I believe that Claudio is wrong, and I do love Beatrice. I will sleep on my final decision.

Can't Get Her Out Of My Mind

Nothing really important happened, except that Claudio prepared for his wedding for tomorrow and I helped. I also painted a picture of Beatrice, not being able to get her out of my mind.

Tidiness For The Lady

Today was a slow day. A man cannot woo a beautiful lady looking sloppy, so I fancied myself up. I went to the barber in order for him to cut my beard. Oh, how painful it was to see the barber cut it, but I did it for Beatrice. While I was at the barber, I brushed my hat so it can looked like new. Not only that, but I had a servant of Leonato clean all my clothing. I then bought a bottle of civet in order for me not to smell, for a lady never wants an awfully stenched man. Although I have not told anyone about my love to Beatrice, the guys mocked me for actually looking nice for once. They said that I was clearly in love, for I had tidied myself up and was supposedly not my usually “loud” self. I really hope that no one figures out that I am in love. I think I might not be ready for this yet.

Beatrice in Love With Me???

Waking up late is a blessing. It seems as if all the missing sleep we had lost seemed to have collected and been found last night. Well rested, I went into the garden to read a book, but started thinking about Claudio falling in the trap of love. I started wondering how any man could fall in love, and “how much another man is a fool when he dedicates his behaviors to love” (63). While I was thinking, I caught a glance of Balthasar, Leonato, Claudio and the Prince coming my way, so I hid. Balthasar sang a song that starts with “Sigh no more”, but I cannot remember it completely. I just remember that the song was a very bad song that was ill sung. Balthasar left, but I overheard a conversation between the remaining men about me and Beatrice. I heard that Beatrice has fallen for me, but will never say that she loves me. At first, I was terrified, shocked and just stood for a good ten minutes, completely surprised by what I heard. I was disgusted by the idea that she loves me, thinking that this must be a trick, but that it must not be because Leonato, himself, said it. Then I started to feel sorry for her, for they said that her heart will break and die before she professes that she loves me, and that she stays awake all night writing love letters to me, only to tear them up in a million pieces the next morning. They said that she “falls, weeps, sobs, beats her heart, tears her hair, prays, curses: ‘O sweet Benedick, God give me patience!’” (73). Also, they said if I ever figure out that she loves me, I would only torment her, which would lead to her death of grief. After Leonato, Claudio, and Don Pedro left, I was in a happy mood since they talked about how I was a great and proper man and always joyful. I think that maybe going away from my misogynist ideas would be best for me. Then I thought, “When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married” (77). I thought about being in a relationship, but I could not decide whether to continue being against love or become for love. Then I realized that Beatrice does show that she loves me through her hate towards me. While I am thinking, Beatrice comes over and says she has been sent against her will to get me for dinner. “There’s a double meaning in that”, since she clearly is in love with me (79). I do pity her, and I must say I do love her. I never thought it would come to this, but I am in LOVE.

Arrival to Messina

As I suspected, Don Pedro continued with his action for I saw a messenger riding in the direction of Messina. Even though Don Pedro told of the news shortly after, the word of going to Messina had spread to everybody. Everybody was thrilled by the gossip of going to Messina and all shouted into the sky with glee. The trip to Messina was pleasant with everyone happy as can be. When we arrived, we were greeted by Leonato, but also by Beatrice. Oh, how she angers me. Nothing do I do, but only does she mock me, so I join in to defend my honor over what, a WOMAN as evil as the devil himself. Shortly after, I was quite shocked by what Claudio said after everyone left us alone. He said that he had an eye for Hero, the daughter of Leonato, and asked me what I think of her. I didn’t know what to say. I mean, I don’t want to upset my best friend since he proclaims that he is in love with her. I answered truthfully, for he asked for the truth, and I say “she is…unhandsome… [and] I do not like her” (17). He continued blabbering about how “the world [could not] buy such a jewel” and how she is “the sweetest lady that every [he has] looked on” (17). He even plans to marry her even after just glancing at her, not even haven spoken a word to her. Poor Claudio. He does not know what he has gotten himself into. I mean he is in LOVE, what more do I have to say. He isn’t even in love with a beautiful lady which is the worst part. Shortly after we were talking, Don Pedro came in asking why we were not with the group and stayed back. As I cannot tell a secret of a close friend, but have close dedication to the Prince, I was forced to tell that Claudio had fallen in love with Hero. The Prince and Claudio talk about Hero and how she is worthy, resulting in the Prince agreeing to woo Hero at the dance after dinner for him since Claudio is too shy to do so himself. All us, men of the army were masked, allowing none to know who was who. Margaret, the waiting gentlewoman of Hero, and I had a humorous conversation that makes me laugh right now. But now my feelings have shifted for I fondly remember the conversation that I had with Beatrice. Since she did not know who I was, she said awful things that she would not say to my face and that hurt me. Why “Lady Beatrice should know me, and not know me! The Prince’s fool! Ha, it may be I go under that title because I am merry. Yea, but so I am apt to do myself wrong. I am not so reputed! It is the base, though bitter, disposition of Beatrice that puts the world into her person and so gives me out. Well, I’ll be revenged as I may” (49). “O, she misused me past the endurance of a block! [She said that]… I was duller than a great thaw [and how] every word [she speaks] stabs… I would not marry her” even if she was the last person alive (51). I don’t think that anyone would even want to marry her in fact, so much that she is evil. If she ever was to date any sane or insane man, the man would not handle any more than a minute with her. Enough with Beatrice! After talking with her, I was told by Don Pedro to get Claudio for the wooing had been successful. When I approached Claudio, he seemed so melancholy, and he left as I was saying that Don Pedro had wooed Hero for him. Don Pedro came to me confused, asking what had happened. I said what I thought, which was that he believed that Don Pedro had wooed Hero for himself. I soon left since Beatrice was inching her way toward us, and I could not bear another insult from her. As I lie on my bed writing in this very same journal, I spoke with Claudio who seemed happier than I ever had seen him. He shouted that he was to marry Hero in a week, and how a week was far too long to wait. He soon stopped and grew weary, as everyone else had become.

Last Day of War Before Messina

Today, Don Pedro has been deciding whether to have us, the soldiers of Aragon, go to Messina to reward us with celebration and much joy. I do believe that Leonato, the governor of Messina, will allow such an extravagant number of people to be welcomed in the beloved city of Messina. I hope Don Pedro will continue on with his decision for relaxation. If the idea is to be pursued, I might not gain much merriment and relaxation though, since the bewitched niece of Leonato who goes by Beatrice will be there. She has a formidable tongue that attacks me, and I swear she talks about me behind my back. Like me, she is disdainful towards marriage and swears that she will never fall in love. I must tell a secret to you, one that I should have told you before. Disgusting, isn’t it. So, I once was in love with Beatrice; gave her my heart, but she tore it apart. Although she may say this story is a lie, and that it was me who tore her heart, I swear that I am stating the truth.

Me

Hello, my name is Benedick of Padua. “I am loved [by] all ladies”, but I will never marry (13). I am a misogynist, and believe that love destroys a man. There is a million reasons to be against love, but I will say only one since it would take me years to write all of them. Since women are untrustworthy, “I will do myself the right to trust none” (21). Since marriage is a trust bond, I will not marry any woman. Never will I write about my love, nor fall in love, but if I do, I swear I will “pick out [my] eyes with a ballad-maker’s pen and hang me up at the door of a brothel house for the sign of blind Cupid” (21). So, enough about what I believe and to what I am. I am the right hand man of Don Pedro (the Prince’s jester), the Prince of Aragon, and my best friend is Claudio, a young, exceptional young lord from Florence who has “borne himself beyond the promise of his age” (7).